Do it now. Go say Thank You.

Larry House died last week. He was my first boss, hiring me for my first wear-a-shirt-and-tie-everyday job at the Lutheran Theological Seminary at Philadelphia in the development office. I will be forever grateful that he took a chance on me, a young, not-ordained, 20-something fresh out of seminary with lots to learn.

Larry was a real mentor to me. He taught me three things that I didn’t necessarily appreciate at the time, but which have proved essential in my ministry several years later:

  1. Larry taught me how to be a professional.
  2. Larry showed me how to give, and he expected me to do so.
  3. Larry modeled a great love for the church and its people.

A few years later, after I left the seminary and was working elsewhere, I called him on the anniversary of my hire date and thanked him for giving me my first job. He was touched and surprised by the call. Yet,  I’m not sure that even then I truly appreciated how much he shaped me. As a pastor, I am grateful for the lessons Larry taught me, and I am continually trying to learn those lessons and practice them in my daily work. And I wish I had fully expressed this to him before his unexpected death early last week.

Who is that person in your life who gave you a chance when perhaps you didn’t deserve it? Who taught you life lessons and professional skills that have proved helpful over the years? Who shaped you into the person you are today?

Figure out who that person is, or who those persons are, and track them down. Give them a call or, better yet, write a letter. Write a letter describing what they did for you and how appreciative you are. In fact, write the letter, copy it, and send two copies – one for that mentor, and one for their spouse or safety deposit box or otherwise for safe keeping. Not to be morbid, but if this person is that important to you, you want these words to be available to their family upon her or his death. And, you want to write and send this letter now, if for whatever reason your death predates hers or his, so that she or he and their family has the chance to know what they mean to you.

I have three letters to write – for starters, anyway. The first letter is to Larry’s family. Though I’ve shared some of these thoughts in person, I want them to have it in writing. I only wish I had done this earlier.

I’ll also be writing letters to two men with whom I have little regular contact these days but who were deeply influential in forming me into the man and pastor that I am today. Indeed, not a week goes by in my life and ministry when I do not think of them. They need to know that. And I need to tell them that.

I have three letters to write. How many will you write?

About Chris Duckworth

Spouse. Parent. Lutheran Pastor. Political Junkie. Baseball Fan.
This entry was posted in Faith & the Church, Vocation and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Do it now. Go say Thank You.

  1. Marjorie Miller says:

    Chris – this is beautifully written and your thoughts are very beautiful. It is so easy to forgot or not get around to or be embarrassed by expressing love and gratitude or to forget or …
    Marjorie Miller

  2. John Kahler says:

    Larry was/is someone to get you thinking about things. As I was looking through the seminary’s website, I was reminded he had written this not long ago: http://ltsp.edu/MyEmptyNesterWill. The first sentence, “Circumstances in our lives change, and we need to think about those changes.” Larry will be missed, but never forgotten. And always inspiring to reach beyond ourselves, and all we can do with simple things, a word, a gift, a kind thought.

  3. Pingback: Learning How to Give | The Lutheran Zephyr

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